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My reflection on 2024 took me through the 15 days of staff and board offsites I was privileged to facilitate. What emerged is that empathy, patience, and clarity are three characteristics teams and boards value in their leaders.
Why these three? Individually, each is essential for navigating the complexities of today’s workplace. Together, they are foundational leadership traits for reinforcing a work culture that encourages collaboration and results in productivity.
As the holidays are upon us, let’s dive right in so you can start celebrating.
Empathy: Looking and Listening to Hear
Empathy allows us to meet our team where they are, especially during times of uncertainty. It helps us understand the root causes of what excites, frustrates, and keeps our team members up at night. Empathy is not just having conversations; it encourages the adjacent stories and considers nonverbal communication cues.
Practicing empathy builds trust and fosters psychological safety, creating an environment where creativity thrives and performance increases. When contributing, people feel valued, are more likely to commit fully to your organization’s mission, and are less likely to leave.
As managers, by practicing empathy, we get a truer read on our team member’s strengths and can better align talent to task.
Empathy in practice: In your next one-on-one conversation, resist giving advice. Instead, ask, “What’s on your mind?” and listen. You might be surprised at the depth of insight this question creates.
Empathy under pressure: Pressure and stress activate our lizard brain. The fight, flight, or flee responses appear as ‘solution mode’ or micromanaging. If you notice this, take a step back and acknowledge the stress. “What do we have? What do we need? What’s the first step?” are three prompts for getting your team back on track.
Patience: Holding Space
Leadership tests your ability to stay grounded, especially when things don’t go as planned. Patience is the capacity to tolerate the discomfort of uncertainty, setbacks, or slow progress without losing your cool. It’s about recognizing that meaningful outcomes take time and growth happens in seasons, not sprints.
Patience does not mean complacency. It’s about staying present and trusting that progress will come with the right support and persistence. This steadiness is what enables teams to thrive under pressure.
Patience in practice: When faced with a delay or challenge, pause and ask yourself, “What’s the lesson here?” With the team, ask, “What could potentially go wrong with this approach?” and “What are the next steps you want to take?” Use these moments to reflect, recalibrate, and model resilience for your team.
Patience under pressure: Imagine your team struggling to implement a new process under a tight deadline. Impatience looks like frustration or micromanaging, adding to the pressure. Patience allows a deep breath to realign tasks to strengths, make space for collaborative work, reinforce accountability, and celebrate small wins.
Clarity: Lighting the Way
While empathy and patience build trust and space, clarity moves the team forward. It’s the antidote to confusion, misalignment, and wasted effort. Clarity means being intentional about your vision, expectations, and communication. A leader with clarity makes sure their team knows not just what they’re doing but why it matters. They provide context, define success, and eliminate ambiguity.
Clarity also means honesty. When times are tough, or decisions are difficult, people look to their leaders for transparency. Sugarcoating reality does not help anyone. Leaders who communicate with authenticity and precision inspire confidence, even in challenging moments.
Clarity in practice: Before your next team meeting, ask yourself: “What’s the most important takeaway I want everyone to leave with?” Lead with that.
Clarity under pressure: It’s difficult to pass on information when you don’t get clear information from your boss. Be as transparent as possible and over-communicate. Even if there is little to report, your team will appreciate the time spent asking questions and refining plans. Use the three pillars of Fair Process: Engagement, Explanation, and Expectation Clarity, so your team feels included in decision-making and is clear on accountability.
Weaving Empathy, Patience, and Clarity into Your Leadership Style
These qualities aren’t silos; they’re a symphony. Empathy creates connection, patience cultivates resilience, and clarity drives action. Together, they form the foundation for a leadership style that is both human and high-impact.
Practice empathy by actively listening to concerns and ideas. When obstacles arise, model patience, offering support instead of blame. Finally, provide clear guidance, ensuring everyone understands the goal and their role in achieving it.
The result is a completed project and a stronger, more cohesive team ready to take on the next challenge.
Final Thought: The Leadership Journey
Leadership isn’t about having all the answers; it’s about showing up consistently as the kind of leader others trust and respect. Empathy, patience, and clarity aren’t traits you master overnight—they’re practices you refine every day.
So, as you lead your team forward, start by listening, holding space, and doing what you can to light the path. The ripple effect will go far beyond the tasks and shape your team and organization’s lasting culture and success.
This is my gift to you from 15 days of offsite learning.
Wishing you a joyous holiday season and a successful year ahead
If you know or have a young person starting out in their career, or if you hire them, this book is for you.
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